I talk a lot about body image and confidence here on the blog and on my podcast. There are days where I feel like a hypocrite because I feel anything but confident. That got me thinking about what is confidence anyways? What does it really mean to be confident?
This past weekend, we had a family photo shoot scheduled to capture my daughter’s second birthday. How did that even happen already?! Anyways. I also needed to snag a few pics of just me that I’ll be using here on my website and at Irresistible YOUniversity.
At the beginning of the month, I had promised myself that I would eat clean all month leading up to the shoot. Ideally, I wanted to lose 10 lbs. That didn’t happen. In fact, the scale went up a few pounds. It was almost like I was purposely sabotaging myself. I was fully aware every single time I went off the rails with my eating or decided sleep was more important than working out at the butt crack of dawn.
The day of the shoot came and I was feeling swollen and bloated. My fault. Duh. Part of me wanted to run back to bed and hide and pretend I was sick.
The other part of me screamed to get up, makeup, and rock your shit lady. I had to give myself a pep talk about how much time I’ve wasted over the years avoiding stuff like this. Not wanting to document a moment in time because heaven forbid I felt “too fat.”
Did you know that since Catalina was born we haven’t done an actual family photo shoot?
No way was I going to let a few extra pounds (that nobody else can even notice) ruin this opportunity.
No way was I going to miss out on documenting Catalina’s parents in this moment in time. Just the way we are right now. Not how we *might* be 50 lbs from now. That little girl is turning two next week – not next year.
Back to that hypocrite thing again. It got me thinking about what the hell kind of confidence coach would I be to duck out on a photo shoot because I felt “too fat?” What kind of message would that send to you? I always tell you to do the thing now – not 50 lbs from now.
See. Sometimes I need reminding too. This confidence/body image journey is never over. Why? Because we are human beings. AKA – not perfect robots that always look amazing. Unless you’re a Kardashian and have tons of money to pay to look like a perfect robot. I think a Kardashian even has fat/ugly/zero confidence days.
We had a blast at the photo shoot even with the circus that sometimes comes with shooting a curious two year old and a Chihuahua who is set in his ways. One of my bestest friends did the photos for us and she knows us so well that nobody was uncomfortable.
I LOVE all the of the pics! We did some of all of us, some with just Catalina, and I took some solo pics that I’ll be using here on my website and in my social media. I’m nowhere near my weight loss goal but I’m far from where I once was and I honestly love the photos. Having that confidence in myself has allowed me to look at pics and not cringe. You gotta take more pics. You need to document your journey. Stop hiding. If you’re a mom, your kids will want to see you IN the pics with them!
What is confidence, anyway?
That leads back to my original question, what is confidence, anyway? There’s a big misconception out there that the most confident people are just that way all the time. NOT true!
Confidence is doing the thing even when you don’t feel 100% ready.
Confidence is putting your makeup and heels on even when all you want to do is crawl back into bed and hide from the world.
Confidence is getting in front of people and motivating them when all you want to do is binge eat a cake all by yourself.
Confidence is getting the picture taken of yourself even when you’re not at your goal weight.
Confidence is knowing you don’t have the perfect body but not giving AF because you’re still fly as hell.
Confidence is knowing you’re irresistible AF and not needing anyone else’s validation.
Confidence is knowing you’re capable of being a total bad ass once you just let go of the bullshit and negativity.
Confidence is having the power inside of you to live the irresistible life you have always craved and effing deserve.
Confidence is being able to do that now and not waiting until everything is perfect.
If you wait until everything is perfect, you’ll never get where you need to go.
What does confidence mean to you??
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I listened to the podcast this morning, and I just kept thinking, “Yes, yes, yes!” Everything you said applies to me and my life. Thank you for your transparency, and for being a cheerleader for all of us struggling with those “I’ll be happy when…” thoughts. You’re awesome. And your family photos are amazing!
Thank you, Christina! There is comfort in knowing we are not alone with these thoughts. xoxo