“I’m sick of being the fat girl. If I could just lose all the weight, then I’ll finally be happy.”
How many times have you told yourself this?
While, the “fat” and the extra weight is what you’re saying is the problem, it goes deeper than that. See, the term “fat girl” isn’t just a descriptive phrase. Nobody uses this phrase to talk nice about anyone including when you talk about yourself. This phrase is used to hurt. This phrase is a loaded weapon that doesn’t “just” go away because you lose the weight. It’s still there haunting you in the background if you don’t address it.
When we start out on a weight loss journey, we think it’s just about the weight. Somewhere along the way, we discover that we’re unpacking so much more than just the pounds. We’re unpacking years and years of emotions, unresolved trauma, hate, insecurities, and so much more. The weight has been there as a shield. A shield of denial. A shield to distract and protect you from what’s really underneath.
Being the Fat Girl isn’t about what you look like as much as it is a mindset. The fat girl mindset will follow you throughout your entire weight loss journey if you don’t learn how to put that bitch to bed. That’s why we can lose all of our weight and still see ourselves as fat or not good enough. It’s because you haven’t changed your mindset. A weight loss journey is not just about losing physical weight. It’s also about losing the emotional weight holding you back.
The fat girl mindset is telling you the following myths that you have come to believe are true.
1. You Have No Confidence
You will only love yourself and your body once you lose all the weight. That’s what our inner fat girl wants us to think. She wants you to be stripped of your confidence. She has shattered it into a million pieces. She has led you to believe that you cannot be anything in life while you’re still fat. You cannot dress up in fashionable clothes, wear a beat face of makeup, walk in high heels and actually believe that you look good. She holds you back from living life at your full potential.
2. You Have No Self-Control
Your inner fat girl wants you to believe that you’re lacking any form of self-control when it comes to food. You’ve been conditioned to believe that this is true. When you feel like shit about yourself and have been robbed of confidence, food is the greatest comfort. You’ve come to believe that you’ll never have any form of control over what goes in your mouth. The truth is that what goes into your mouth is one of the few things in this life that you can actually control. You get to decide. Once you can put a name to the actions like binge eating or emotional eating, you now get to now make a choice. See, your inner fat girl is actually quite insecure. She knows that you are actually in control but you haven’t been empowered to believe that just yet. Girl, I’m here to let you know you CAN do this!
Read This: Dear Fat Bitch
3. You Don’t Deserve Happiness
For so many years, my inner “fat girl” told me that I didn’t deserve to be happy and have fun until I lost all the weight. What a waste of time! You deserve to be happy now at any size or weight. Please do me a favor and do not wait for the weight. A weight loss journey is not a contained environment that you do for a few months and then go back to life. This is not The Biggest Loser ( I hate that show BTW!). You have to learn how to lose the weight while living your life now for this to sustain forever. So, stop putting everything on hold until the weight comes off.
4. Your Body is Just Like This
She knows you want to lose the weight. She knows that you’re capable of it too. She knows that you’re actually in control and that if you took control, she wouldn’t have a voice. Instead, she has led you to believe that this is just the way you are. You’re just big boned. Um, that’s not a real thing. You’ve been fat all your life why try now? Just follow that ‘fat acceptance movement’ and stop trying. NO! You don’t have to live in a body that makes you feel like a prisoner. You don’t have to live in a body that limits you. You’ve got to accept where you are right here/right now and then make a choice. Make a choice to stay miserable or make a choice to change.
Read This: Fat Girl Rules: Never wear Tight Clothes & Other Ridiculous Rules
5. You’ll Never Get Rid of Me
The Fat Girl mindset doesn’t disappear just because you get to your goal weight. She wants you to know that even if you lose every single ounce of extra weight, you’ll never get rid of me. I’ll always be here reminding you that you’re still not good enough. That if you’re not careful, you’ll be right back where you started from. You will never be able to get rid of me. This is all true. It’s true if you don’t start addressing this stuff now while you’re on the journey. You cannot expect to go on a weight loss journey, lose the weight, and then magically become this new person on the inside. It doesn’t work that way!
So the next time that you think, “I’m sick of being the fat girl.”, remember that this isn’t just about the weight. It’s about all of the emotional baggage that the weight has caused you. That doesn’t go away on a treadmill. That doesn’t go away by eating clean. It goes away by doing the hard work on your mindset and learning how to take care of yourself for the first time ever.
So, how can you actually start doing that work that I speak of? The first step is to download my free 5 day action plan workbook. This workbook provides you with the exact same five guiding principles that worked for me and changed my mindset forever.
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Hi! I’m Aimee with 2 E’s. I'm a confidence coach that empowers women to love themselves by breaking down body image issues, so that they can lose the emotional weight and gain the confidence to look and feel irresistible...at any size.
Aimee, You go girl! you have done a great job! “I’m Sick of Being the Fat Girl” is exactly what people like me needed the most. You are absolutely right about all the bullet points that you have made and Yes, I have been a culprit of saying 3rd point to me a 1000 times “You Don’t Deserve Happiness” I can relate to this post.