“How did I gain all of this weight?”
“How did I gain back all the weight I worked so hard to lose?”
“How did I get here?”
These are actual questions I used to ask myself all the time. I say all the time because this is when I was on the yo-yo diet/body hate shame cycle with no end in sight.
Recently, I caught myself watching “My 600 Lb Life” while trying to fall asleep. I talked about this show in this post about The Victim Mindset. I get so many blog and podcast ideas from this show. I’ve guilty of totally judging these poor people and asking myself, “How could you let this happen to yourself?”
Pretty effed up coming from a girl who struggled with weight her whole life, right? I would think “Yea but I’d never let it get that bad. I mean, wouldn’t I stop at the 300 lb mark? What about when you can no longer fit in a seat or use a seat belt or leave your house.”
Really? Are you sure? Would you be able to stop?
It’s not my place to judge. There are plenty of people that could have said the same for me when I reached my highest weight. Shoot, they could say it now!
All of this dialogue is not actually the point of this post. So, what is the point?
5 Traits That Cause You to Gain Weight (& Stay Overweight)
I’ve noticed common traits in the people from “My 600 Lb Life” that are the same traits that I used to have that caused me to gain so much weight…and what I see in a lot of my community members. These are the traits that cause us to wake up one morning and ask, “How did I gain all of this weight?” They’re traits that if we don’t create awareness and a plan to stop them, the weight is going to keep piling on.
In this post and podcast episode, I’m breaking down the 5 traits that are causing you to gain weight and stay overweight.
1. A Trigger Moment or Moments
Excessive weight gain is not the actual problem. It’s a symptom of something larger (no pun intended). I’m not talking about someone gaining 20 lbs because they love pizza and aren’t the spring chicken they used to be. That’s different. I’m talking about excessive weight gain from emotional binge eating. You don’t just wake up one day and weigh 600 lbs. There’s always something that triggered this. Remember that trauma comes in different forms. The weight gain comes because you don’t have any other coping mechanisms so you turn to food.
2. Mindless Eating
Weight gain that is spurred by an emotional event or events doesn’t happen when you’re mindful about what you’re eating. Mindless eating, zoning out, and numbing yourself is how you wake up one and day and ask yourself, “How did I get here?” The foods I got really fat on were hot pockets, huge bagels dripping in butter, fast food, and eating out with no limits or moderation what so ever. Mindless eating is when you eat without realizing exactly what you’re eating. It’s standing up in front of the fridge while eating. It’s eating quickly and taking another bite before you’ve swallowed the first one. It’s finishing a huge meal and not realizing where the food went. Mindless eating is not being aware of the choices your making nor the portions of food you’re eating.
3. Total Denial
This is a big one that I see ALL the time and something I experienced. When I had my first major weight gain, I was in complete denial. I slowly just stopped wearing my clothes…especially my denim shorts and my jeans. I somehow convinced myself in my mind that I didn’t want to wear those things. I started wearing more ‘stretchy’ clothes. I stopped having a period for almost a year. I couldn’t walk around my college campus without feeling like I would pass out. I clearly remember looking in the mirror one day and seeing these red, angry streaks ripping across my once perfect skin. My stomach had literally started ripping apart from the weight gain. I’m ruined…at least that’s what I used to think. Not even that stopped me. It just threw me into even more of a depression. I started convincing myself that I wanted my clothes to fit bigger so that’s why I’d buy a 2X or a size 20. Until they weren’t actually loose. Here’s the most ridiculous example. I had these cute ankle boots that I really loved. Except they never fit. They couldn’t zip up over my legs. So, being in complete denial I wore them anyway…unzipped! I told myself and everyone else that was a new style. DENIAL is real, y’all and it will keep you stuck in your bad habits.
4. Entitlement
I call this the “entitled fat girl” that lives inside of you. This is the voice that convinces you that you NEED something sweet. That you deserve it. And if you don’t get it, you’re going to throw a tantrum. You see this all the time on the show! When the overweight person gets angry with their enabler to buy them fast food or sweets. OMG, even when they do this in the hospital while they’re recovering from weight loss surgery. Not everyone has an enabler in their life. Maybe you’re your own enabler. Entitlement is the victim mentality showing up once again! You think that your circumstances are so unique and terrible that you’re entitled to eat what you want. You might be going through some stuff but continuing to binge eat because you feel entitled is only hurting you and stopping you from losing weight and recovering.
5. Not Asking or Accepting Help
Emotional binge eating is a form of addiction. All addicts have a streak of selfishness and think that they can enter the recovery journey alone without help. They’re too shameful to admit they need help, let alone ask for it. If any of us could do it alone, everyone would be thin with no issues! This really goes back to the denial. If you ask for help that means you’re admitting there’s a problem. You need a community of other women that understand what you’re going through. You have to have accountability and support. Staying in isolation is another part of this disease and it’s going to prevent you from stepping into your power and becoming the irresistible woman you’re meant to be.
Comment Time! Which one of these traits do you struggle with?
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Hi! I’m Aimee with 2 E’s. I'm a confidence coach that empowers women to love themselves by breaking down body image issues, so that they can lose the emotional weight and gain the confidence to look and feel irresistible...at any size.