I got this quote in my inbox tonight from The Secret,
“Adjusting to a new path and a new direction will require new qualities and strengths, and these qualities are always exactly what we need to acquire in order to accomplish the great things ahead in our life.”
It really struck me.
Two years ago when I started this blog and started taking the weight off for my wedding, I did some soul searching. I wanted to know what my purpose in life was. I was at a point where I wanted to stab myself with toothpicks rather than be at my job at that time. I knew that life just had to have more to offer than rotting in cubicle hell for the rest of my life. I would always say, “well one day when …” I got so sick of saying “one day” and I realized that if I didn’t start taking action, one day would be when I was either 80 or dead.
It hit me that I needed to take this “curse” of being overweight and use it as a gift. I wanted to inspire others by telling my story and helping them overcome the same issues and challenges I’ve been through.
I got lost along the way. After I got married and gained back my weight because of depression, I felt like I couldn’t be that role model or serve that purpose that I know I was put on this Earth to do. I felt like I had let people down. I felt like a failure. How could I preach all this “irresistible” you can do it, mumbo jumbo if I wasn’t doing it anymore?
But, as I started to get better, I realized that it’s ok. It’s ok, that I gained the weight. I could still tell that story because it’s part of MY journey. It’s also probably part of your journey too. We all make mistakes. This isn’t easy. It’s not always a one time fix it all situation . . . and that’s ok.
I realized I wouldn’t want to read a blog of someone in a similar situation that did it “perfectly” Who the hell does that?!? This was also part of learning to let go of that “all of nothing perfectionist” mentality” that many overweight people carry with them.
Back to the quote . . . Sorry, I know I can ramble lol.
The quote reminded me that I have to make these lifelong, lifestyle changes in order to fulfill my purpose. These new “qualities” are going to allow me to make the changes I need to lose the weight and give me the strength to inspire, empower, and motivate others. I don’t know yet how I will end up doing this but I just know it’s part of a bigger plan.
I just wrote a post about how I wasn’t quite sure I believed you needed a Higher Power to lose weight…BUT, I suppose I really do believe in a Higher Power of some sort because I believe that we were all placed on this Earth to do something bigger than ourselves. I’ve always believe that.
I know that I’m meant to be doing more with my life than just designing insurance training from 8-5 every day. It makes me incredibly sad to envision myself doing that for the rest of my life. I’m grateful for having a wonderful job that pays my bills but I’m always striving for my real purpose and I won’t give up. I wouldn’t have been given all of these hurdles and challenges in this “fat suit” if I wasn’t supposed to be using them to teach others.
But first, I need to continue taking care of myself and getting to a healthy weight and self image once again. This time, I plan on taking you along the ride with me and not doing this alone.
Well, enough rambling for now. Have you thought about what your life purpose is and are your living it or steering in the right direction?