so i changed

Last week I blogged about how I was feeling all kinds of emotions after my surgery. Anxiety, stress, and depression kept trying to pop their ugly heads into my life. They are NOT welcome here!

There’s a big shift in how I handle those emotions now compared to before. Trust me, I still have moments of weakness where icing and only icing will do.

BUT . . .

When I catch myself feeling down or feeling completely overwhelmed and anxious, I know that means I need to stop everything I’m doing and clear my head. I put on my work-out clothes, lace up my sneakers and hit the gym (aka my garage lol).

Working out makes me feel strong, it makes me feel in control, and it makes me feel like I can accomplish anything. Once I’m done, I feel 10000 times better!! I’m able to be more creative with my work and get things done without anxiety tapping on my shoulder all day.

I used to always turn to food when I felt like this. I didn’t even realize I was doing that. Now, I actually think twice about how binging will make me FEEL. I look at the “before” pics and remember how I felt. I FELT miserable and I looked it.  I know that gaining weight again will just make me more anxious and lead to serious depression. No thank you! Ain’t nobody got time for that!

closer than you think

Since my surgery I’ve been feeling like I’m not doing enough and just been feeling “fat”. I had to stop and remind myself where I started from. I’m still 60 lbs less than my all time highest weight.

I wasn’t at my highest weight a year ago but I was getting really close.  I found this pic from the same exact week in April, one year ago. I was shocked. It’s a great reminder that I am so much further along than I thought. IT’s a reminder that I am capable of reaching my goals. It’s a reminder that I can get knocked down and stand up again.Irresistible Icing Before and After Weight Loss

Instead of being 100 lbs away from my ultimate weight goal, I’ve only got 40 lbs to go. FOURTY!!

FREAKIN’ FOURTY!!!!

Hellooo, that’s nothing! That can be achieved THIS year. When I look at it that way, it just seems so obtainable. I refuse to let anything get in my way this time!

This doesn’t mean I’m perfect or that I’m doing this perfectly. There is no wrong way.  This doesn’t mean I don’t ever eat emotionally or binge. I still do at times. Remember this is a journey not a before and after story!

“Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.”
~Lao Tzu~