There is so much online clutter going on right now, that I can’t seem to focus on my goals. Between keeping up with my personal Facebook, my Facebook pages, Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram, my blog roll, the latest and greatest news, gossip, emails, and phone calls, I’m having a really hard time doing what I love most: using my creativity to write and design.

The struggle. I know.

BUT, in order for the world to see all my creative ideas, I have to market it online. I have to be in the know, all the time. I can’t afford to fall behind in the social media world. If you go off the radar, people might forget about me! OMG, what if I miss something?!

Then, the ADD kicks in (thanks a lot Pinterest), when I see all of these other GORGEOUS blogs and the projects they are creating. Wah. Why aren’t I that good? Why don’t I have the time to dedicate to doing what I love: being creative and making things pretty.

So, I start feverishly pinning and adding links to my “to-do” folder. I think, when I get through my MUST-DO list, I’ll get to all these wonderful, gorgeous, inspirations that I really need to do. Because that is the missing link. That is what will push me into the big leagues. But, I have real-life appointments, obligations, and responsibilities, unplanned emergencies, oh and a full-time job that takes me away from what I love: being creative.

Wah.

Boo.

I hate this struggle. It’s a war that rages in my own head. A false sense of urgency that I put on myself. So, I end up not enjoying life in the moment and spend time feeling anxious, making more to-do lists because the first list wasn’t good enough and then next thing I know it’s midnight and I’m exhausted and haven’t spent 10 minutes dong what I love: BEING BLOODY CREATIVE!

I have goals and dreams, just like you do. I want this more than anything I’ve ever wanted.  What is that you ask? Finally being FREE and becoming my own boss full-time, making a living doing what I love; designing, creating, writing, and possibly just possibly inspiring somebody out there. It’s like a magnetic force in my body that I can’t control. I’ve always felt it, even in elementary school. I‘ve felt it in every single job I’ve had; that I’m supposed to be somewhere else. I can’t even describe how strong this feeling has always been. It’s overwhelming.

The times where I’m 100% doing the work that I love, I don’t feel that. Instead I feel this calming, peaceful, happy, zen-like feeling and all the anxiety is gone.

I have to stop getting distracted by the painful act of comparison. Yea, someone else is doing it better and bigger. I’m just not there yet.

Life keeps pulling me in a 100 different directions and sometimes it’s just so hard to focus and concentrate. I hate that. Nothing in this world is going to come to you. If you want to be where you envision yourself, you have to make it happen on your own. YOU have to take the right steps and ignore the junk, the clutter, the haters, and keep pressing on.

I also have peace that if you’re meant to be doing something, the universe or God (what ever you believe in), will guide you there. Every rejection, promotion, relationship, and choice has prepared me for the next opportunity, but I didn’t know it at the time. They are all connected!

BUT, most important and especially for myself, don’t forget to take care of yourself in the process. The more I absorb myself into my work (b/c I need things to happen NOW), the more I block my creativity and my spunk. So, I know it won’t be easy but I’m doing what I need to do in order to start cleaning out the clutter (for now) so that I can focus on the things that I want and need.

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